Our trip in numbers*

*Lazy format I know. But I have a month of rather low productivity to catch up on, so please forgive the shortcut.

Nights in the UK: 30
Days with rain: At least 20. But, as ever during an English summer, it didn't matter one bit.

Dips in the sea: 1 for me (3 for my dear friend the Gambler, who is made of stronger stuff). That's one swim more than I've managed in Hermosa Beach thus far. It was lovely. Shark free too.

Visitors to Saltburn: 11. That's right, lucky old us, eleven lovely friends made the schlep to come and hang out in our little holiday house by the seaside. Combined with the handful of friends we caught up with in London, and our brilliant family weekend, and almost daily contact with my sister and her crew, this made for a very highly peopled and really very very happy holiday.

Lady P's always assumes people are thrilled to see her, wherever she is, as she rushes about shouting 'HI!'. In the case of a transatlantic flight, or our presence in the airport lounge, this isn't the case. But in the case of the many days spent with friends and family, it was always true. Her sense of self-worth is at an all time high.

% of washes we messed up because we couldn't understand the washing machine: 30. Yes, one in three. I guess TLOML may have a point about all those symbols - and I have clearly been out of the country too long, for I was as clueless as an American about it all.

Nights we had curry for dinner: 4. Which is 13% of our total dinner consumption. On reflection maybe we should have had curry a couple more times. Still, we enjoyed getting reacquainted with a couple of favourite curry houses.
Days without consuming alcohol: 3. I think. But it might only be 2.
Days during which I took any meaningful exercise: 7. Which is pisspoor, especially combined with all those curries, not to mention vast quantities of proper cheese, bread and butter. And leads me nicely to...
Pounds I think I probably gained, and quickly need to shed: somewhere between 7 and 14. At a guess. I have decided not to find out for sure.

Outfit changes required due to uncontrollable, um, bodily eruptions during our 10 hour flight home: for Lady P, 4. For me, 2. To be clear, I wasn't the one doing the clothes soiling.
Hours early Lady P arose today: 2.5. Which, given she just covered an eight hour time difference is not bad. Although it does mean I got up at 4am.

Slices of country life

I want Lady P to get something a little hard to express out of this, and subsequent, trips to the UK - as well as quality time, of course. I want her to soak up a bit of Englishness. A sense of home. And that home (sometimes) is a place with wonky stiles over misty meadows, where eggs are kept out of the fridge, and postboxes are red. Where beaches are not packed with volleyball nets and fringed with palm trees. Where sheep and ducks exist in fields, not just in storybooks. Where marmalade and marmite, scones and 99s are eaten. I also wanted her to do lots of running around, raise her stair climbing skills (we have none at home), be windswept and to splash in puddles.

I am getting it.

Practising on the bandstand steps, like her cousins before her

Grazed knees

Gleefully shouting 'baa'

Damp, slightly cool sand

Literally licking the marmalade out of the little dish it came in

I reckon a few weeks of this every year will keep the little English girl inside her alive.

Quality time

When you're only going to see your family once or twice a year, you have to make those times count. This year we were lucky to have my parents reaching a significant birthday as an excuse for a weekend away. All three of my sisters, their husbands and their children in one house for the weekend. It was brilliant.

I'm talking about having the run of a huge old school house in a picturesque Yorkshire village. A family sports day including a handstand competition and a potato-and-spoon race (anyone who knows my family and our legendary lack of athleticism will find the very concept hilarious). Afternoon birthday tea with the kiddos - followed by a massive dinner for the grown ups when they were all tucked up in bed. Albeit they were awake till 10 with the excitement of sharing a room with their cousins.

I'm talking Lady P taking baths with her big cousins who are basically rock stars in her eyes. A treasure hunt in a rambling house, organised by my oldest niece who gave us all certificates of participation. Older cousins pushing younger ones on swings, roundabouts and see-saws. A rambling run with my little sister and favourite running companion, replete with stunning Dales views and only getting a little bit lost.

Grown ups chilling out while seven small children ate cakes together on a picnic rug on the lawn. That brilliant thing where, when I lost sight of Lady P for a few minutes, a quick shout up the hall 'Anyone seen my baby?' brings the reassuring reply of a three year old saying 'Yes, I'm helping her on the stairs', and I could settle back down to a gossip with my sisters.

And Lady P shouting 'Bapa! Bapa!' as her Bapa (Grandpa) attempted a sneaky nap, giving in moments later to jiggle her on his knee and read her stories. A family trip around a lovely ruined castle, my nieces and nephews so delighted one of them actually went to bed that night wearing his paper crown.

About 2/3 of us in front of the house

Race time: my child is the naked one going the wrong way

Lady P tickling Richard III's toes at the castle

Dreaming of kingdoms

Pure bliss and the making of many happy memories. Bring on next year's trip.

A belated happy fourth

As I said, I've been too busy to blog. But we did find time to mark the Fourth of July - and I'd like to wish my American readers a Happy Fourth too. We had a G&T and a burger on our balcony overlooking the north sea, and felt very far from the US of A.

Back in Hermosa I believe the town was going wild. Apparently July Fourth is one big party. As we were leaving the flags were already going up.

Including some on our street: everybody woke up one morning to find a little flag outside their house. It was a rather sweet marketing campaign by a local realtor. You know how I feel about their ridiculous ads - but I thought this was a cute idea.

Until the next day. When another realtor had come along and put their flags - twice the size - next to the original flag.

Way to advertise yourself as a big old douche bag, right? I know who I'd want to sell my home. The first one, the agent with the good idea.

However I suspect in a land where bigger is better, and no commercial opportunity goes unexploited, most people will go with the guy with the larger flags.

Too busy to blog about it

Wow. I've managed to post at least once a week through several complicated house moves. Through the birth and early weeks of Lady P. And through the return to work and the beginning of that juggling thing we do when we work with small children and still want to have a life that includes cooking proper dinners and taking the odd run. I always kept posting.

But this trip has defeated me. For the first time ever I have been too busy to blog.

There are two good reasons for my lack of words:

1. Despite being away for a month, I'm actually still at work
Only without childcare, and in a different timezone, and with no data roaming on my work phone. Which makes me a bit busy and quite stressed. I didn't want to fritter all my holiday allowance away so agreed with my boss I'd work most of the time I'm here. I thought it would be easy. It is not.

After a few fractious days, TLOML and I sorted out a schedule of sorts. We both get short windows of time each to sit and properly work. For the rest of the time it's conference calls from the playground, and hurried emails between putting Lady P to bed and having dinner with TLOML.

2. There is way too much fun to be had here
So this is the other reason and it's a better one, I think. There are cousins to play with. Granny to chat to and toddle about with. An aunt who knows all the good songs and games. Auntie Kath & Uncle Al's garden to explore. Ducks and sheep and horses in fields to gaze at. Cliff lifts and slides and see saws too. There's a lot here that six short months ago was a bit beyond Lady P and is now completely enthralling. We have enough help around us that we could just palm her off on her favourite auntie, or my mum, and get on with our work. But I'd really rather be there for the fun stuff.

I don't want to miss this

Something had to give and I'm afraid it was the blog. Rest assured, I've got my priorities straight.